School is Starting (2013)

"Be the change or get beat by the change"

So school starts tomorrow. I am not very excited for some reason, but I hope I will get excited tomorrow. This year is going to be great and swimming is going to be phenomenal. My day will be busy because I have to work though. I am excited to be doing so many things this year. So now onto highlights of the summer (that I can think of right now):

Kitty: Obviously this is not his name, but it suits him well. He works with me and is crazy, and obsessed with cats. He is really funny and Allie used to have a crush on him. He has an afro, but is really white. He is one of the only old guards who started out being nice to me, well nice isn't the right word, but he didn't look down on me and has been my friend. I am a little bit too mean to him on occasion though, so I should probably be nicer. But I think he likes my meanness and sarcastic-ness, because he always says I was his favorite shadow guard. (A shadow guard is someone who is going to be a lifeguard, but you have to "shadow" for 6 days. Shadowing means you get assigned to follow around one of the older guards for a shift and they mentor you. He was the third person I "shadowed" and way by far the funniest.) I usually just call him Perv, but I didn't want to put that as his name, because then you would just assume he is a pervert, but it is just an inside joke between us about how he is probably a perv. He calls me a perv too, but not as often as I call him one.

One of my supervisors, during a swim party I was lifeguarding at, told me to hide inside a garbage bag and jump out when one of my coworkers walked past to scare her. It worked, and my supervisor also scared me in the same way before that.

I went to the Big A** Show yesterday! It was a concert and it had bands like Panic! at the disco, Blue October, Capital Cities, Brogan Kelby, The Airborne Toxic Event, Pepper, and a few other bands. It was a lot of fun and I got to go in the mosh pit, which was an intense experience. I went with Allie and Fae. They were cool and I am glad I went with the two if them.

I have worked most of this summer. As a lifeguard (if you missed that part) at the pool I swim at for swim team.

I ran out of Danny's (which is not fake blog name of Denny's in case you were wondering.) on Friday this week and tried to  knock on Steven's truck window when he went through the drive thru, but his window was rolled down, so I almost punched him in the face. Then I laughed a lot while him, the guy in the passenger side of his truck, the girl at the drive thru window, and Shelby all stared at me. It was pretty funny, which I made sure to tell them all. And afterward Shelby told me Steven was on a date, but when I texted him to say sorry he said it was actually a guy (with long hair and a girly shirt Shelby tells me, I didn't actually see the guy, I am taking Shelby's word for it on his facial expression when I came up to the truck too, because I didn't actually see him.)

I went to Lake Powell, and Rae and I actually didn't fight, but we didn't really talk at all, so there was no time to fight. I also went to Swim Camp at BYU with Allie (which I think I kind of blogged about). I went down to Orem to visit my grandparents and their new house, my little sisters stayed overnight, but I had work so I couldn't.

Charlie: She is a girl I work with who has long blonde hair. She is really nice, but a lot of lifeguards find fault with her scanning the pool because she misses a lot sometimes. She can get on my nerves, and I have judged her for not noticing what is going on in the pool sometimes, but she is really a nice girl.
 As a twist in this story though, she made out with the guy who Shelby was going out with for a lot of the year. I can't remember what I made his name on my blog, but he is pretty cool. He wanted to meet my parents once, and he has given me a few rides, and he gives awesome hugs. I would never like him, but on Valentine's Day, the day of the swim banquet, (when I found out that I didn't letter and that Jake was leading me on and actually had a girlfriend) I was really upset and trying not to cry and he came up to me and, even when I said I didn't want a hug, he hugged me anyways and spun me around. It made me happy, so I made sure to hold it together until I got home. So even though we never talk, and he avoids me, I really think he is a good friend for that. And because when I decided to fast one day during the school year when I was taking steroids I started shaking and he let me use his jacket so I wouldn't be so cold. And once he stole my letterman jacket and hid in the boys bathroom. So basically, he is pretty cool, and I still think of him as a friend, even if he doesn't think of me as one. But don't get me wrong here, I would never like him. He is kind of like that one gay friend who is so fun to be around and so funny and nice, but you would never have a crush on him in a million years. Because the thought of him being anything besides a friend is disgusting, but not having a friend that randomly hugs you when you are having a bad day is kind of a depressing thought. (The hugging me when I was sad happened a lot, not just at the swim banquet.)

Also, a girl who I work with texted me one day when I was on-call, and asked me to switch her so she was on-call and I was working. I didn't want to, but then she told me she just found out she was lactose intolerant and ate something that made her sick, so I took it. Everyone at work thought I was crazy because they didn't see that as a good excuse, but being lactose intolerant myself I thought it was. So I took it, and she got more sick, so I would have been called in anyways. Then she took my shift for the Big A** Show, so we are friends now. She called Shelby a rude name, but she has been nice to me and, as far as I know, has been nice to everyone besides when she called Shelby a name.

That is all I can really think of right now, so ta-ta for now!

Sorry, haven't Blogged, getting on that now (2012)

"Sometimes in life, doing what we shouldn't do is the emergency, Peekay," -(Hoppie) The Power Of One Bryce Courtenay (pg. 75)

"You say that you love rain, but you open your umbrella when it rains.You say that you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines.You say that you love the wind, but you close your windows when wind blows.This is why I am afraid, you say that you love me too." -Unknown

Okay, summer has actually been awesome this year. One thing, well actually two things, I have noticed through all of this are: Firsts and Different Perspectives.

Some first have happened this summer, quite a few of them this last week. The most surprising first is Rae. Everyone in my family is all about how Rae has been doing so much better in the last year. They say that she is more mature and less stuck in the past, but I never have really seen it. This week we had a family reunion and I noticed it for the first time. Rae and I don't live together, and when ever we see each other it is an instant screaming match it seems like and often ends in her laughing and me crying. Whenever this happens it ends up with everyone taking my side and feeling bad for me and her losing it and saying why it is all unfair. This week we actually got along for the most part. She was nice to me consistently and I was nice to her consistently back. She didn't ever hit me and said very few mean things to me. She must be maturing, and I am glad. She kept talking about how when we were little she would always trick me and then trap me under the couch, but besides that she seems to be living in the present. She graduated this year and I am glad, it seems like a great thing for her.

The next first is not exactly a first. This whole last year (Like 12 months) have been full of new things. Last summer I was called a B**** multiple times for the first time(it was at space camp by a rude boy who pretty much made that my nickname). I am normally pretty calm, so people usually walk over me more than call me that. I guess that is what happens when you stand up for yourself. Last week I was called a Demon for the first time. I have been called a demon before actually, but never with the fire and hatred I heard about two days ago. After being called a demon I was accused of brainwashing everyone. Me and Cassidy had apparently brainwashed my sisters and all of the other kids there.

The other first is this year I have been getting a lot of people telling me just what they think of me. This kind of leads into the perspective part of my blog.

In the last year I have been called many things. It makes sense because different people are with me in different senarios, but it is interesting to me. I have been called an angle of the devil, a devil child, a demon, a B****, and a W****. I have also been called sweet and the nicest person, and great moral support and a whole slew of nice things. Everyone seems to have their own idea of me that doesn't seem to change.

How am I "The creepiest person to ever live" and "the Sweetest person alive" at the same time? Rae has the same problem she said. She says she is Rae the Slut to half of her school and Rae the goody two shoes half the time.


Okay, sorry this is just like a blog draft purging day! I don't know where I was going with this one either, and I am too lazy to reread it and try to figure out, so yep. have fun if you do read this. ...maybe I should stop putting these notes at the bottom, because I guess most of you would end up reading this last if you actually did read through.... oh well. toodles!

Ignore this, just like a random post I never published, thought I should for Posterity or when I want to lookback and remember the timeline of events in my teenage years or something

Summer Update! (2012) Summer After 9th grade, just a year or so late

"Skittles u should! Use the term yolo!" -Allie (This is irrelevent to anything right now, but it made me laugh because the term YOLO is so over used and cheesy.)



"I think about the million miles away where you are just a memory, and everyone will think I'm deep and not just lonely." -Bottle of Wine Patti Fiasco (This song may be a little country for your taste, but I really like the band.)

This summer has had a lot of firsts in it, so I think it's only fair to write a little about them. This summer has been exciting, definatly the most busy summer I can think of. Along with swimming and hanging out with friends I went on a few trips.


The first trip of the summer was to my grandparents' cabin. We went for fathers' day and had kind of a family reunion there. We were there for about three days and almost the whole time Rae and I got along- which is a first.


For the 4th of July my family went to wyoming to see my mom's parents.
I went on trek, pretty cool, but my family older brother and sister were not very committed or organized, but it was a good spiritual experience. and it reminded me how much stronger I was after 9th compared to after 7th grade (I went on trek then too). I went to powell, not much exciting there that I can think of....



Not finishing this either, but I guess this is just like an awkward journal entry or something, ignore it

Varsity/Oh No! Lyrics (written May/June of 2013)

Here is the rest of that Post! I am starting with rewriting the first part:

"Don't do love, don't do friends; I'm only after success.
Don't need a relationship, I'll never soften my grip.
Don't want cash, don't want car; want it fast, want it hard.
Don't need money, don't need fame: I just want to make a change.
I just wanna change. (x5)
I know exactly what I want and who I want to be.
I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine. 
I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy. 
Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no. 
One track mind, one track heart. If I fail I'll fall apart. 
Maybe it is all a test, 'cause I feel like I'm the worst -- so I always act like I'm the best. 
If you are not very careful, your possessions will possess you.
 TV taught me how to feel, now real life has no appeal.
It has no appeal, it has no appeal, it has no appeal, it has no appeal.

I know exactly what I want and who I want to be.

I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine. 

I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy. 

Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no.

I'm gonna live, I'm gonna fly. I'm gonna fail, I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna live, I'm gonna fly. I'm gonna fail, I'm gonna die, die, die, die.

I know exactly what I want and who I want to be.

I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine. 

I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy. 

Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no.

I know exactly what I want and who I want to be.

I know exactly why I walk and talk like a machine. 

I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy. 

Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no.

Oh, oh no, oh no, oh no."

Marina & the Diamonds - Oh No

(The color is green for the chorus, but the rest of the color is just because I am bored)

I think I will use this song to demonstrate some of the things about this year. I will start with the most recent events.

"Don't do love, don't do friends; I'm only after success.

One track mind, one track heart. If I fail I'll fall apart. 

I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy. 

I'm gonna live, I'm gonna fly. I'm gonna fail, I'm gonna die.

I know exactly what I want and who I want to be.

I just wanna change.

I tried so freaking hard all season. I think it was a little bit of an unhealthy obsession with varsity, but it goes with I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy. I was so scared of not making Varsity, and in the end I didn't. All of encouraging all of my friends saying they would make it only made it sting more. 

I can't remember what I said, so maybe if I am feeling depressed I will come back and finish this post, but probably not. Basically this song is the song of my swim year.
 One track mind, one track heart. If I fail I'll fall apart. I had a one track mind and heart, I failed at my goal and fell apart.
"Don't do love, don't do friends; I'm only after success.I set everything (love, friends) aside for success in swimming.
I'm now becoming my own self-fulfilled prophecy.  I became my own self-fulfilled prophecy in failing, in falling apart, in the swim season not working out, and basically everything else I feared.
I'm gonna live, I'm gonna fly. I'm gonna fail, I'm gonna die. I felt like last year swimming I lived and soared in it metaphorically, then this year I failed and died in swimming because it sucked the life out of me.
I know exactly what I want and who I want to be.I knew my goal and exactly what I wanted, no question or second guessing it. and I all I wanted was to change and get better.
I just wanna change.I just wanted to change to be a better swimmer...
   That's all I am doing for now, I am to tired to do more and I don't want to get angry about again.

But I had strep during regions, so you can't blame me for maybe not swimming my best. I now (In August) regret nothing, because I am going to be a beast at swimming this year, and nothing will stop me. I am just dedicated and focused this year, but not fearful anymore. sometimes you have to hit the bottom of the pool before you can push back up to the surface. You have to pull an arrow back in a bow before you can launch it. basically: I am going to use this to make the best comeback possible. New goals, new perspective, new ideas, new knowledges, new hope, and old fears conquered by facing them. Better get ready Mr.T, because y'all aren't gonna know what hit you or how to comprehend that I don't need everyone like the coaches supporting me or even caring. And you can go help Nikki, or x-ee. Give Nikki skittles, you have made it clear I am old news since your son (Jake) ignored me at Cotillion. He decided he wanted a hicky from Nikki and you decided it was probably my fault. So prepared to be shocked when I am actually more confident now. Though thank you for being there when you were. It really meant a lot and I needed that confidence and help.

Shelby said many times, "It isn't a big deal, EVERYONE gets a letter. It doesn't even mean anything." which was I guess well intended, but it really stung when I didn't. 

Sorry the end of that got a little scatter brained and not very in-depth, but I am to done with this topic to finish, but I need to publish this so it doesn't sit there as a draft driving me crazy.

This quote kind of fits the swim season perfectly

"And the worst part is

Before it gets any better

We're headed for a cliff

And in the free fall

I will realize I'm better off

When I hit the bottom"

~Paramore, Turn it Off

Summer 2013 (As of July)

Okay this video is kind of stupid, but I like the actual song. It has been stuck in my head all day, well that and Funhouse by P!nk, which they are both really random songs, so don't ask me why.

I actually had a lifeguard shift from 9-12 today, so I was out guarding and just singing this song. (It's called "I Just Wanna Run") Try singing it with a wide range of emotions, it is kind of funny because it actually works really well with a lot of emotions. It works when you see your coach and want to freak out at him, or when a cute guy smiles at you or looks at you, or when you are thinking about anything, or even just plain nothing; try it, it works.

I do that with a lot of songs I have found though, like it works for the current emotion. Except Kryptonite by Three Doors Down, that one gives me a really hard negative adrenaline rush that is probably not healthy, but it motivates you to do well. By negative adrenaline rush I mean you get a lot of adrenaline, but you get really angry and upset and want to do something, but you don't even know what to do because nothing can really express your anger. I don't know if you ever feel that, but it is not good, your heart is beating really fast and you could do something with the adrenaline, but at the same time you can't because you start just shutting down. I heard Kryptnite a few weeks ago on my ipod when I was awake in the middle of the night and I decided to listen to it and see if I could get that adrenaline rush, and an hour later when I couldn't stop pacing and was really angry and upset I regretted it. So yeah, negative adrenaline rushes are not good.

But it is negative because it reminds me about varsity and how much my swim season sucked, I actually really like the song. In case you want to listen to it, here it is:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ooooh, maybe I should make this all about music!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay, so last week I went to a BYU sports camp for swimming, I learned a lot and I feel like my technique is greatly improved. I went with Allie and although we swam in different pools we hung out most of the day, these are the songs of the week: I Write Sins Not Tragedies by Panic at the Disco, All The Pretty girls on a saturday night by F.U.N., and Sunset in July by 311

Sunset in July by 311:

(I really like the guitar in this)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All the Pretty Girls on a Saturday Night by F.U.N.

(vain isn't it?)

I am not going to include I Write Sins Not Tragedies because it swears and I don't know if that might offend someone, plus I don't feel like listening to it right now. You can go search it if you so desire.


_________________

I would add more, but I would prefer to add more music right now...


So for the end of the school year, as in the last few weeks, my song is Kyoto by Skrillex. It is a song that I listened to a few times with some of my friends, who are actually really girly and you would expect them to listen to Skrillex, but they love it, and so do I. Oh and one of my other songs for swim camp is "Breaking a Sweat" by skrillex, I will post that below the current video (Kyoto).

Kyoto---------------------------------^

Breaking a Sweat ----------------^

OKAY! So this is by no means done, but I don't want to finish it and school starts next week, so it will be too late to post it then, sorry you are getting half done posts, maybe next time I have an anxiety attack you can get a full hearted attempt at a post ;) Have fun, happy last week of summer, I will be better a blogging this school year, I Promise! (even if it is just a promise to myself, maybe if I say it I will do it.)

Okay this year I will
~Blog more
~make my "one thing" to work on be swimming
~not freak out and have an anxiety attack
~get Nick or Al (cute soccer player) to notice me or some other guy I actually like
~Not let The two snakes who ruined a lot of last swim season get to me ;) I think I got my revenge when I realized how much they care what I think and how they see me.
~That's it! sorry if you don't know me, or don't know me well and have absolutely no clue what I am talking about.... But noone has read this in like a year, except Allie last night, so I figure it doesn't matter if you understand because I am mainly talking to myself

Bye!

Hello Again

And the decades disappear like sinking ships, but we preserver. God gives us hope, but we still fear what we don't know. The mind is poison.
~ A Dustland Fairytale ~ The Killers ~


Okay, so I know I have like 5 different almost done posts, but it won't let me open them, so I am just starting from scratch. I was going to blog every month this summer, but that was kind of a no go, so here I am to end the summer with a post.
So big highlights of the summer are life guarding and swim camp, but it has actually been an exciting summer over all. I should go in order of importance or chronologically, but I think I will start with what is the biggest deal to me right now: Nick!
Before you get thinking I have a new boyfriend or something, let me explain. Nick was in my lifeguard certification class. When I heard his name I recognized it from when I was little, because we were neighbors. So I have a good memory of that and remembered him, but he had absolutely no idea who I was. So I talked to him a little and told Allie I thought he was cute, and she agreed to ask his friend to be her partner for practicing head splint spinals and I got to be with Nick. And after lifeguard certification we didn't really talk. UNTIL NOW!! Okay, fine, so we still haven't talked, but we have a date this week and I am so psyched for it!!! Here's what happened:
Last week when Allie and I were working the same shift, we happened to somehow get to the topic of who was a better friend. (Not in the girly, "No, you are a better friend!Oh stop it you are so much better"kind of way, more of in the, "Well I went to swim camp just for you, so therefore I am a better friend" kind of way.) So after we were done arguing we went to Danny's (a fast food restaurant) and kinda forgot about it. 
Later last week Allie and her guy friend Andy were hanging out, "prank" texting people from each other's phone. So Andy told Allie to text Nick and about hanging out on Thursday. So Nick said yeah, and Allie asked Andy if we (she and I) could come. So Nick said that we should just make it a double date. And instead of being last Thursday it is now some other day this week. But to bring the story back around, Allie is now winning the better friend contest for now. Because I really think this kid is cute and I almost (okay, maybe I did) shrieked with excitement when I heard about it (quietly of course, because you can't just scream in excitement at work). So do you want to hear about Nick? I think you do. He is tall (I would say definitely over 6'), shaggy brown hair, brown eyes, kinda buff but not like body builder (but he looks fit), super super shy, quiet, and he makes a really funny face when he holds his breath. Also he is patient, because the head splint spinal that I got to do with him took me forever to get, so he kept being patient after Allie had enough of me not figuring it out. (For the record though, it is actually one of the easiest saves.)
So I am thrilled about the idea of a date with him, and Allie is nice to set it up, because I know she may not be the most enthusiastic about going on another date with Andy. (They have gone out a few times and he really likes her, but it is a one sided thing.) I can hardly contain my excitement!! ...Except they are taking forever to plan the date, so what if it never happens?! What if I don't get to go on a date with Nick?! Well, either way, he is on the Dart swim team (Which practices with my team, the Lancers, for high school swim), so I guess I will still see him.

See, I get half way done with a post, then I begin to bore myself! How am I ever going to finish this?!

Okay, so going to Danny's is something I like to do with my friends after work sometimes, like going with different friends depending on who I work with. (I think the cashier there is starting to recognize me and knows what I am going to order now...) But last night I went with Allie and Shelby. And that is why I am blogging again, because they told me to. It was kind of funny and they read about themselves in my last post. Allie laughed when she figured out who "Ryan" was in my last post without even having to think very hard. Shelby got hair extensions, which are nice, but I actually love her hair short too. Allie got puppies, but then she had to give them away. 

Oh! I am going to the Big A** Concert this Saturday!! I am looking forward to it a lot! I am going to it with Allie and (Crap forgot my fake name for this friend...) Fae. Fae is on the track team and loves Panic! at the Disco, just like me. We had a .. misunderstanding.. earlier this year, but we are great friends again now. So I don't really know what else to say at the moment, so I will leave you. But first, listen to this song, even if you have already heard it. I love it. It is a great song, but actually listen, don't be shallow.

P.S. There is a guy at work, who is friends with Allie. He is a perv. That is his name to me, and yesterday he was talking about his parents' names and I burst out laughing, hysterically. I think he thought I was rude, until I said I was laughing because I already knew their names.... now he thinks I am creepy and stalk him. Moral of the story: Don't tell people when you have been stalking them on face book and if you think you might start laughing go away or come up with a really funny joke and pretend you just remembered it.

"leave your legacy in plaques that line the halls. hey shut up, hey shut up" Sorry, last quote (Andy you're a Star. The Killers) "Andy you're a star. In nobody's eyes but mine."   

"Ready to roll into something new?

It's taking its toll and I'm leaving without you

Cuz heaven ain't close in a place like this,

 I said, 'Heaven ain't close in a place like this'

Bring it back down, bring it back down tonight,

I never thought I'd let a rumor ruin my moonlight, 

well somebody told me that you had a boyfriend

who looked like a girlfriend,

 that I had in February of last year

It's not confidential, I've got potential

rushin' around rushin' around ...

 When all I want to do is try

Well somebody told me...."

Hahahahaha Totally just lied to you. But now I am done

Update! (As if anyone reads this)

Hi there! I have so much to say, the hard part is deciding what track to go off on, so bear with me if this gets confusing (or boring).

First: I am trying to think of a good quote, because I love quotes, but I am listening to music and it is hard to think about quotes when I am listening to music. I would quote the song I am listening to, but it doesn't fit... partially because I am not 100% what the song is talking about....

So friend update first? (Skip to the "New people this year" part if you want, this is just restating people I have talked about in the past in case they care)

SWIM PEOPLE:
Allie- Allie and I eat lunch together and are even closer this year. She is funny and we have all these inside jokes about Steven (her ex-almost boyfriend who this year said he liked her then ditched her and got a girlfriend). Allie is pretty cool and did life guard training with me and we are doing a swim camp this summer for a week at BYU. Nothing really more to say without getting nostolgic or something. Also, the memes you send me are hilarious. 

*Like this:

Shelby- Shelby! She came to school with me today! I think I embarrassed her, but it was so nice to come. She is out of school right now and I bribed her with fruit roll ups, and she brought her pet sugar glider. Her sugar glider is named Zuki and is really cute. She is the only person I can talk to about certain things and she had some very similar experiences to me this year. (more on this later)

Jinni- Jinni and I were close during the summer and we had summer drivers ed and called my friend Chris and had so many jokes about him. Over the year we stopped talked so much, but we talk sometimes.

Steven- Steven has been bipolar toward Allie and I am not really friends with him now. He is a Dart (goes to a different school), so I don't see him a lot.

Tom- I didn't really see Tom this year... he is pretty cool still though I think, even though we don't talk a ton.

Beth- Did I really include her in previous lists?! We aren't friends... nothing personal, she is great and all, but we aren't friends.

OLD SCHOOL FRIENDS:
Pink Lady- I never see Pink Lady! She is a Dart (so we don't go to the same school). I need to call her up, because she is just so freaking amazing and we need to catch up. She, as far as I know, is into taking AP world and Pinterest and being asian and being a genius.

Taylor- Taylor and I never see each other, but we have hung out a few times. She has needed to talk to teachers before and I have gone with her (for moral support) like she did with Mr.T last year. We went on a double date a month or so ago and we say "hi" to each other in the halls. It is sad, because she is one of my best friends, but maybe during the summer we can hang out more.

Moogle Kid, Salsa Sideways, Zenna, Ezlob, Raven Goode- I never see any of you, but I guess we have texted a few times. You never figured out if there was a mystery boy though and who it might be, I am disappointed in all of you guys and you sub-par creeper tools. Raven Goode I see at church, but that is about it.

Sakura- I never see you anymore, but I still love you! You are just amazing and I love your writing.

NEW PEOPLE THIS YEAR :
  Okay, if you want real info, this is what is interesting.

Ryan- Ex-Boyfriend... stalker.... I use then interchangeably. He was sweet, but got a little needy. Want honesty? He ruined a lot of the swim season by being depressing. BUT he was nice and took me of real dates and tried his best and really I feel bad for him. We only went out a few times, but he is my first kiss, which is pretty special.

There are a few people this year (that I am not going to name because that will just complicate things) that tried to make this year miserable. I have started to not care, but for a while it really worked and I hated life and swim and I just wanted to be alone and to not care.

Tay- Tay is a friend as of this year, she is amazing and we have fit for life together, she is so sweet and I just love her.

Mama M- I never call her this, but Jacky and Nat Cat do (I will explain Nat Cat in a minute). Mama M is the best. We always walk during lunch and talk and she is easy to relate to. We don't agree on everything, but we are very similar in a lot of opinions. She is one of my best friends and can understand complicated relationships (family and otherwise) better than most.

Nat Cat- Nat Cat I actually call Nat Cat. Sometimes I use her real name, but I like Nat Cat. She is best friends with Jacky and, along with Mama M, they have a trio. Nat Cat seems quiet at first but she really isn't. She is really funny and is nice. I only got to know her well recently though because we have math together.

Lassy- I mostly just wanted to type Lassy.... He hates being called Lassy, but that's what he gets. He called me Katniss the other day though, so I think we are kind of even. He is in my Fit for Life class and is a comedian. He can be harsh and sometimes doesn't know when to stop a joke, but he is pretty cool still. He took Mama M to Prom and has so much energy. He has more energy than almost anyone I have ever met.

Carl- Jacky and Carl like each other and they talk a lot. I don't know Carl well, but he is really funny and yep. Oh, and he took Jacky to Prom.

CC- Notice how the names are getting less and less creative? CC is the boy who I went to Prom with. He was in my health class and we became friends. He is a pretty cool cat and we are good friends. He is best friends with Carl, I think. We also went to MORP together. By the way my Prom group had CC, me,  Jacky, Carl, Lassy, Mama M, and two other couples in it, just to clarify in case you are trying to keep track. (Though I don't know why because this seems boring and confusing probably.)

Jake- I honestly don't know what to say about him right now, I'll get back to you on that.... or not, depends on my mood and if I continue to blog.


I would give a brief overview of this year, but it might get boring because it might start going off on random stories and bore you, so for now I guess it will be a mystery....


But for now: I am going to work for Surf-n-Swim soon, I took the AP World History test, I got a 97% on my Math CRT and a 91% on my science, friends are good, no romance (which is good right now), I am doing Surfers, and yep, that's about it. (at least for the last week or so, things always change ya know.)


Happy Weekend! only 3 more days of School!!!!!